Recovery

Dear Best and Wonderful Family and Friends In The Whole World!!!!!!

Well, I will be honest . . . it is hard starting this letter off . . . as I have been on the computer and reading all your guys letters, I have just been balling my eyes out in gratitude. I don't think I will be able to describe in the least bit of how much love I have for each and every one of you. I have truly been blessed in my life beyond measure where I don't know how the Lord could be so merciful to have blessed me with the best family and friends in the world! 

Well! Here I am! I'm alive everyone! Don't worry! Ha ha! But I will go into detail of how everything went down with the surgery! But first of all I want to express my gratitude for each and everyone of you! I wish I could tell each and every single one of you in person to thank you for everything you have done for me! And to be able to be there to give you such a big hug. I love you all so much! I especially want to thank each and every one of you for your prayers. Just thinking of how many great and wonderful people who have been praying for me nonstop this past week has really just put tears to my eyes, with a heart full of the love you all have demonstrated this past week! I know prayer is real. If there is one thing that I have learned this past week is the power of prayer. To just know that all my family, friends, a lot of missionaries, and to know that my name has been put on prayer rolls in temples across the West Coast, has really endowed me with the strength this past week. I can't thank you all enough! There have been countless number of times where I have felt all your prayers in one moment this past week! I love you, I love you, I love!!!!

Well, onto my week! Let's start right off back with Monday! To be honest I wasn't nervous at all to have the surgery! I was really calm and relaxed and ready. But we started off by arriving to this HUGE hospital to where I had to wait at the reception's desk to fill out a lot of documents which started off with the tiny obstacle to where they almost didn't let me go to have the surgery because, I suppose, that one of the people in the mission office was supposed to give me a paper that says that the church will pay for the operation, but I never heard anything. The receptionist was a little upset and said that if there was no payment . . . no surgery. I called all our different leaders and while Elder Kimball was talking to the lady, I just bowed my head and offered a tiny prayer to let this all work out in order. I looked up and right then the head office manager at the hospital just so happened to pass by and asked us what was the problem. We explained it to her and he looked at my name tag and yelled out, "Oh! They're the Mormons! I have had patients from your Church, you are all really honest and I know you guys will pay in the future." Ha ha! So then he turned to the receptionist, gave her a little look and after we didn't have any more complications. :)

Then they showed us to my hospital bed room where I had to change into one of those awkward gown things where you feel like your are basically walking around naked, ha ha! And from there and for the rest of the afternoon, they did a whole lot of tests! They first put me up to a IV to where the nurse missed my vein like 3 times, ha ha! I actually kinda had to help her find it and push it in, ha ha, good thing I love anatomy! Ha ha! From there they took some heart rate tests, some blood tests, and an ultra sound test. Which now I finally feel what women have to go through when they're prego ha ha! But then, finally, I was done and they made me shower with this special skin cleaner shampoo stuff and rushed me off to the operation room!

From there the last thing I remember was the really attractive nurse who told me to count down from 100 and I remember I got down to about 91. . . and then I was out! Ha ha. I woke up to Elder Kimball and two other office elders from the mission next to my bed. Ha ha, they said I was pretty out of it and was pretty funny. Ha ha, I still don't know exactly what I said, but I hope it was not as embarrassing as my wisdom teeth video. The other elders just told me that when I woke up I was just talking about the attractive nurse who put the sleep medicine in me right before the surgery. . . ohhh mmyy. Ha ha, a little embarrassing ha ha. But they told me that the surgery was about 2 hours, but it only felt like 2 minutes to me. But from then it was about 5 and from then I just rested and had a huge team of nurses that took care of me the whole night! Elder Kimball, poor little thing, slept on a little 4 or 5 foot couch bed thingy that they made him, but he is such a stud! I wouldn't want ANY other companion to be with me unless it was Elder Kimball! He was a rock star this week! And I think I will always be indebted and grateful for his service this past week! 

President came in at about 11 at night with his wife and that really made my day! They are the best! We talked for a while and that is also when I was able to talk with you and Dad, as well Mom! And as I said on the phone, they weren't letting me fall asleep until I went to the bathroom. Well, that was a little annoying because I didn't have any feeling in my lower part of my body, but I knew I had to go to the bathroom. But finally at 1:05 in the morning I called the nurses, told them to get me up, and I went to the bathroom. For a couple of hours they were trying to make me pee in bed into a weird medal thingy. But it was just awkward, so I was grateful when I stood and gravity did all the work! :) Ha ha and  I was able to sleep through the whole night!

Tuesday the office missionaries came again. They came to pick me up and they dropped me off at our pension. So on Tuesday I don't really remember a whole lot. I remember sleeping almost the whole entire day. Wednesday I remember was probably the most painful day and the hospital gave all my medical papers and with the prescription of the pills I needed to take, and gave them to the office missionaries who didn't realize they had those papers until Wednesday when they were finally able to come by and give me my pain pills which made that night a whoooole lot better than the day and afternoon! Ha ha! And basically from there, each day I took recovering in the house. Yes, Mom, I was obedient and didn't leave the house. But just being in rest and recovering wasn't going to stop me from doing something!!!

So I was able to read all the books of Luke and John and half of Acts in the New Testament. I watched all the church movies we had in the house. I finally made my "My Family" pamphlet and filled it out with pictures and our information. As well, I read the entire Liahona from May of this year and read all the talks from General Conference and I read all my journal entries from day one up until now! So even though I was in the house a lot, I was studying, studying, studying!!!! 

But I will be honest, Wednesday was the most painful day . . . but Friday was the worst. Not physically, but just mentally. I was going a little crazy just being in the same house in the same place, not being able to do anything. It was really hard for me. But that is when I felt most of your guys prayers came into effect. Right when I finished the movie, "To This End Was I Born" I was left thinking a lot of the life of the Savior. And with earlier in the week already reading the first half of the New Testament, I have been pondering a lot of our Savior's life and ministry. That is when I started to be a little bit more chill and realized that we as humans will always have the ability to be better . . . to change. At that moment I read a general conference talk by Elder Bednar about "the load" and Elder Uchtdorf's talk about gratitude. Those two talks helped me a whole lot to be able to really humble myself, to realize more of the Lord's hand in my life at this moment and to know that everything will be fine. That everything . . . no matter what will work out for its good. Another confirmation came to me as I read over my mission journals and as I read time over time of the miracles and tender mercies the Lord has blessed me with this past year in Chile. I knew He hadn't left me. I knew He wouldn't stop those miracles. And I know without a doubt that I have been protected by Him this past week. Today was evidence of that as I prayed for the strength to be able to write you guys today. And as I got off my knees in the morning of this humble prayer . . . I was able to raise straight to my feet without pain and started to walk without pain. 

I know my Heavenly Father has been watching over me. There is no doubt in my mind. I still can't describe the force, the love, the feeling of comfort and peace, that you guys' prayers gave me. Those prayers really raised me up. I am grateful for the chance to have this past week to get to know my Savior and Heavenly Father on a more personal basis. I am grateful for my companion, Elder Kimball, who was the most patient through it all, who was always there on my side to help me. And I am grateful for the power of prayer. That through the many struggling times this past week, I know the Lord hasn't stopped His work--to which was confirmed to me in your lovely letter, Mom, which brought tears to me eyes to know that you were able to take over and bring those souls unto Christ where I couldn't. Some might think that with almost two weeks lost in the month of August, that there isn't must time left. But Everything happens for a reason! There will be nothing to break my faith in my Savior Jesus Christ to believe that miracles still exist, that there is ALWAYS a way, even in the mist of the darkness. I know He lives. He loves us and watches over us. He has been with me and is still with me. My heart burns bright for the love I have for my Redeemer. There is nothing to worry about. I know I still have more time to recover, but in time and in order the Lord will bring worth His work and His glory here. 

Again, I humbly and lovingly express my gratitude for all of your prayers that really physically, mentally, and emotionally have healed me this past week. I have been praying every day that for all the people that are praying in my behalf that they may be blessed in returned. May the Lord be with you all. May you all feel His love. And I hope you can all feel my love for each and every one of you in this letter. I know I can't express it well just over an email, but I know how the Spirit works, and I pray that it will testify of these things to you all. I love you all. Thanks for everything! I will keep going forward until everything will work out! Don't worry about me! Good ole Elder Kevin Cowan is alive and strong! May you all have a great week! 

LOVE YOU!

Elder Cowan!